life update ig

[americasuitehearts]

i freaking love my mom, but we’ve been arguing a lot lately. its never that serious, just small petty stuff, but its still frustrating. i feel like shes scared of me growing up. i get it of course— im her child— but its like she doesn’t respect my opinions. the big thing recently has been trying to pick what high school i should go to. i have a very clear idea of which one out of two options i want to go to. id have a bus there, my friends are going there, but mostly bcuz of this amazing art program they have. meanwhile, my grandpa wants to send me to the other school bcuz he’s raciest and think that the other school is too “ghetto” for me🙄 its not like my grandpa has to go to the school, why the hell is his opinion more important than mine? and any time i try to talk about how i see things, my mom just dismisses me by saying im young and tha my opinion doesn’t matter in the end. like, what?! idk its just really annoying. also, the school i want to go to is more of a “liberal arts school” i guess, and my mom says she’s worried that ill become too “woke” or whatever… that’s another problem: politics. i care a lot about that stuff and i have my own beliefs separate from my family. anytime something political comes into conversation and i don’t immediately agree with what my mom beliefs, i get told that im completely wrong and crazy for thinking that way. its like 10x worse with my grandpa. hes MAGA and refuses to listen to any opinion other than his own. ughhhh.

also, i think i might have a crush on my best friend. oops.

ive kinda talked about her before, B, but im gonna start referring to her as belly (she gets really pissed when i call her that it’s so funny). ive known belly for 2-ish years and me, her, and our other friend have been a trio for a while now. she’s one of the kindest people ive ever met, she’s super observant and cares a lot about all of her friends, she’s supportive and constantly puts other above herself, she’s smart and i know she’s capable of so much in life, and she’s so gorgeous. the other friend i was talking about, lets call her filly (another inside joke lol) is the most conventionally attractive out of all of us, but no one ever talks about how pretty belly is. is that weird to say? i always wanna tell her that, but i don’t want her to think im weird or something. i don’t think id ever ask her out bcuz i care about her too much to risk ruining our friendship. idk feelings suck everything sucks ugh.

thanks for reading this stupid rant. peace out

-r

p.s. mitski’s new song is SO PEAK!!!!!!!!